There is this story I read couple of months ago that really resonated with me and it goes like this: ‘There is a saying: Those that plant dates do not harvest dates. That’s because date palm trees take 80 to 90 years to bear the fruits.
Once a young man met an old monk planting dates and asked: “Why are you planting dates if you know that you will not harvest them?” And the old monk looked at a young man with a kind smile on his face and replied wisely: “Son, go eat a big fat d..k. It’s my f…ing yard and I plant whatever the f..k I want”
Obviously, first time I read this story I almost pissed myself laughing. It had really funny punchline that I didn’t expect but then I started thinking and I realized people ask a lot of ‘why’ questions and sometimes they can be really really annoying.
The way I see it there are two type of why questions. First type are ‘why’ questions that come out of goodhearted curiosity of people that are interested in something they are not familiar with. Those ‘why’ questions do not judge, they are just and simply interested in you. It’s like when somebody asks me about LCHF diet just because they never heard of it and would like to know more, I don’t have problem with those questions and I will gladly answer them whole day.
The other type of ‘why’ questions are aggressive questions that are forcing you to defend yourself and your choices. It’s those questions I have a big problem with. People who ask those questions don’t really care about you, they don’t want to know more, they just think you owe them explanation on things you do or your life choices. No matter how you answer those questions you will be forced to keep defending until you give in and admit that your choices are somehow wrong to the satisfacion of your attacker or you loose your cool and become aggressive too which will make you attack back. Either way you will end up being annoyed and emotionally drained.
Here is the thing, I don’t think you owe an explanation to every person demanding for it. Don’t get me wrong, those directly affected by your choices and actions do deserve them but when you encounter those who attack you with their why for no reason just look at them with a kind smile on their face tell them to ‘go eat a big fat…’ and just leave because they are not worth your time or your attention.